WTF....

So, finally getting around to posting about this now that I'm all chilled out about it. Tuesday was supposed to be a laid back day for the most part. The plan was that on my day off, go back to Oak Harbor and disassemble and bring home the boys bunkbeds. Sounds simple and uneventful, right? Nope, not in my life. Nothing can ever be that simple or uneventful. So I show up, everythings going great, we're getting along and then his mother shows up. She gives me a f-you look when she just walks right in, no knock, no ringing of the doorbell, just waltzes right in. So she closes herself in the room that steve is in (taking apart the 2nd bed while I sort through the toys and garbage in the other room). She starts talking to him about "the dna issue". Now I know where that big fat load of shit came from. Psycho. So I confront her and she gets all bitchy with me. So I get really bitchy with her and it becomes an argument and I wind up pushing her out of my face. I told her several things I thought of her, along the lines of she's a shitty mother, shitty grandmother and a child abuser. Because it's true. And I also told her she was crazy. But not in such nice words, any of it. I was pissed. And the stupid bitch called the cops on me, so now I'll be getting a citation in the mail (since I left) and possibly have to go to court and jail. God I fucking hate her. All I wanted for that day was to have a relaxing day, get the kids beds, maybe con lunch out of steve and be on my way. But no, she couldn't let me have that. She had to show up and start shit. I told Steve to keep the fucking beds, I'd buy them new ones somehow and they could continue to fight for who gets to sleep on the couch. At least he was nice enough to try and make things better for me on his end, and I'll be trying yet again to pick up the beds. So help me god, if she shows up, I'm calling the cops on her for tresspassing. I'm so sick of the drama. That's all he's given me, whether he's meant to or not, is drama. I want a nice quiet peaceful life, that's all I want. I'm tired of drama in my life, I'm tired of never having a quiet peaceful day. I just want to have a place of my own, with my kids, and be happy. Is that too much to ask? I think it must be honestly, because I just can't seem to have that.

MMmmm Cinnamon Altoids....

So my youngest decides he needs to go digging through my purse this morning, finding my brand new tin of cinnamon altoids. I hear a "crunch-crunch-crunch" and a look of "hmmm not sure I like this" and get a "MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM" from him. He had a mouth full, 2 more in his hands and a couple on the floor. I let him finish eating the ones he'd gotten out, and took all my stuff back from him. A minute or two later he was begging for a drink, lol... Maybe next time he'll stay outta my altoids... But judging from his eldest brothers experience with my Jalapeno Tims Cascade Chips (bottom of the bag where all the seasonings are) that isn't likely, lol.. Kids, gotta love them for the entertainment value! ;)

Argh...

Frustration. Pure and simple. It's my life. Total frustration. Granted a lot of my frustration stems from the choices I've previously made. Like the choice to leave my husband before I got a job and saved up money for my own place, putting me in the mercy of my friends. While I love them to death and am extremely grateful to them for taking my children, sister and I all in, I'm so sick and fucking tired of the shit that goes on here supposedly "under the radar". For instance, I know my kids can be annoying, and quite often get into trouble for stupid shit, but also quite often they're being set up to get into trouble. Their eldest child is a sneaky little shit, and really has her parents wrapped around her little finger. She's excellent at twisting things to get my kids in trouble, and does so at every given opportunity. And to get what she wants. It's really annoying. Granted, we all see through her when she tries to tattle on others, and that doesn't really fly. But she's screwed them over more than a couple times. And then there's the chores thing. My boys do the majority of the housework, and have given up just about everything in life they're used to. It's totally upended their whole lives. I feel extremely guilty and terrible about this, and kind of wish I could rewind back to August and not have ever moved out. I'm sure things would be much MUCH different at this point in time. Maybe even better. But that I'll never know. I'm just frustrated with life on many levels and in many aspects. I hate many of the choices I've made and I'm dealing with them the best I can. I'm just so frustrated so much of the time that I want to beat my head against a wall, and maybe someone else's as well. I've also come to the conclusion, that the most under-appreciated and un-recognized women are military stay at home moms. Regular civilain stay at home moms, really, just can't hold a flame to them. Bitch and whine all you want about needing a break and your husband coming home late from work, but really, shut the fuck up. Until you go weeks or months or god forbid a year or more without a "break" or even seeing your spouse, you just really don't have all that much room to bitch about it. I've been there done that. It's not any fun, and you feel like your whole being, not just your head is going to explode. And they wonder why so many sah"m"m's are on head meds.... Okay, enough of my ranting about random shit for this evening. I'm feeling a bit better now.... Can't wait to go to bed... argh.